Pockets Gal... or? Pockets Galore

Photo: a toddler wears a pair of classically faded blue jeans. At least three pockets are in the picture; two more lurk 'round back. Why does a baby even need pockets? Babies may not need pockets, but they deserve them!

An open letter to Lands End

Dear Lands End,

I bought beautiful Lands End flannel shirts for my husband and myself last Christmas. They weren't the matchy-matchy ones - which you evidently don't make. His was of a substantial, durable-seeming material, nice buttons, sewn well, and had, oh, at least two front pockets. Mine was also well-made, nice fabric, great comfy styling... and ZERO pockets. Why? I also have two hands, carry all sort of things, and would have loved a place to stow some carryables. I even double-checked the side seam because sometimes they put girl pockets there. Nope. Nothing. (NB: Even your "Boyfriend Shirts" for women don't have pockets!)

Maybe you think that I can use my purse? That capacious tote that sometimes doubles as overnight-bag and survival kit? But I don't carry it with me when I am stacking wood, doing chores and just hanging around the house. Pockets. Pockets are great. Pockets are needed by anyone who needs a shirt. Perhaps you think it is infringing on my femininity or my modesty to place to big patches over my chest region? Really, I don't mind. I don't need your shirts to accentuate my positives, wherever they may be located. 

I need pockets. As many as you can give me.

Sincerely,

A Pocket Gal

If I could count the phones I've dropped and broken because measly little pockets won't hold them! If I could name the things I've misplaced because I "just set them down for a sec while I did something"! If I could get back the dollars that have fallen out of narrow, shallow pockets that were basically pockets-in-name-only! When it starts to hit the old pocket... well. 

What's the big deal?? Women have fought for the vote, for equal pay, for the ability to decide what to do with our own bodies - heck, we're still working on that one! Do women have to fight for the right to have pockets? 

I will send a shout out to my favorite purveyor of stylish clothing for women-of-a-certain-age-who-still-feel-somewhat-young-ish: J Jill - those folks put pockets in all sorts of things! Side pockets, patch pockets, hip pockets, deep back pockets, zip pockets. They've got 'em all. 

In the history of human sartorial advances, I believe that the pocket stands right at the top. Collars? For straight-up cowards! Zippers? Nothing a button can't do. Sleeves? Well, that one's basic. Pockets enabled our prehistoric forbears to carry home berries and nuts, stow some dried protein for laters, and put away that slingshot and rock until they were good and ready. I can only imagine the chaos that reigned before we could carry stuff hands-free. 

So, in the name of all that is holey (pocket pun, get it??), please, please grant me the serenity to use pockets for loose change, the courage to ask for pockets, and the wisdom to know the difference between carefree clothing and careless design. To quote my elder grandson's favorite joke: "Why did the golfer have a hole in his pocket? So that he'd always have a hole-in-one." To that I will add another joke: "Why did the seal carry fish in her mouth? Because she didn't have any pockets." I feel ya, seal, I feel ya.